henrypaget.com

The past two years have been challenging. Having chronic wrist pain that gets in the way of your hobbies and life is difficult.

My mental health suffered, but I’m 7 weeks post-op from my last wrist surgery, and the whole situation has been a painful learning experience.

Because my mental health has suffered, yet I’ve managed to get through the worst of it, I thought I’d write an article on how to be mentally strong and fearless.

You may be wondering why I’m also including how to be fearless, and it’s because of this:

When you’re dealing with chronic pain, even waking up is enough to inspire fear in you. 

Before I get to the 13 tips, I want you to remember that fear is there to protect you, but sometimes we fear things not worth fearing.

1. Do Hard Things to Build Unbreakable Mental Strength

When you see yourself overcoming insurmountable challenges, your mental strength will go through the roof.

Bodybuilder Arnold Schwarzenegger became the best bodybuilder in the world. He then became a movie star and a politician.

Achieving difficult things leads to achieving more difficult things; it’s a virtuous cycle.

What challenging task/ goal will you overcome?

2. You’ve Survived Worse Before—You Can Do It Again

List all the times you’ve overcome challenges.

When you write them down, you’ll realise “I’ve overcome difficult situations before, and I can do it again, there’s clear evidence I can.”

3. Surround Yourself With Mentally Strong People

Not everyone is blessed enough to have mentally strong people in their lives; that’s why I read autobiographies/ biographies of mentally strong people.

Some of the best ones I’ve read are:

Total Recall by Arnold Schwarzenegger.

An American Life, a biography of Benjamin Franklin by Walter Isaacson. 

Elon Musk’s biography by Ashlee Vance.

4. Your Fear Might Be Rational—and That’s Okay

Not all fear is redundant. A couple of months ago, one evening, I was driving on a 60 mph road when, out of nowhere, a white car sped toward me. The driver was speeding on the wrong side of the road, which was my side of the road.

I feared for my life and made a quick decision to drive on the grass off the road. I managed to swerve to avoid the driver and was okay.

Thankfully, fear saved me from death.

5. Mental Strength Is Built Daily, Not Overnight

Like physical strength, mental strength is built day by day.

You don’t become mentally strong by sitting in front of the television watching friends.

You get it by taking on and overcoming challenges daily.

6. Real Strength Only Comes From Real Struggle

Most people think challenges test your mental strength, but they don’t; they build it.

I feel like I’ve grown so much since I developed this chronic wrist problem; when my wrist heals, I’ll feel like I’m in dreamland.

7. Develop Thick Skin and Ignore the Noise

Earlier, on one Quora post, someone said, “This post is stupid.” I replied, “Can you give me constructive feedback on why you think it’s stupid instead of insulting me and my work?’ He didn’t reply.

The truth is, no matter what you do, there will always be people who hurl abuse at you. The world has always been like this and always will be. I expect rude comments.

8. Study the Mentally Strong to Borrow Their Courage

One of my inspirations is the former UFC fighter and champion Khabib Nurmagomedov.

He’s one of the most mentally strong fighters the UFC has ever had.

Khabib grew up in Dagestan, Russia, wrestling with bears.

Here’s what Khabib says about how living a hard, tough, disciplined life breeds success.

 “When you have a hard life, a tough life, success becomes very easy.”

9. We Live Easier Lives Than Any Generation Before Us

It wasn’t long ago that we had to go outside to use the loo in outhouses.

Now, with our modern-day comforts, we’re getting soft.

Life is too easy now in every way.

I often remind myself of this quote by former world champion weightlifter Jerzy Gregorek:

“Hard choices, easy life. Easy choices, hard life.”

10. Seek Intellectual Discomfort at Work

I recently wrote and published my first book, 10 Stoic Principles that Will Make You Invincible. I rechecked it about 10 times and had to make sure there were no errors. It was challenging, but I know I’m a better writer for it, and my next book will be better.

In the corporate world, I’ve constantly challenged myself, and more often than not, when you meet those challenges, you become mentally stronger and better.

11. Your Comfort Zone Is Lying to You

Lift the heavier weight (safely), and go on that solo holiday to Rome. Go diving. Whatever you’re scared of, do it.

You’ll realise your fear was imagined all along.

12. You’ll Be Forgotten—So Stop Being Afraid

One day, you’ll take your last breath. Stop being afraid. Most things are not worth the fear our minds tell us.

13. Fear Is Just an Impression—You Can Drop It

Everything changes when you realise you don’t have to be a prisoner to your thoughts and emotions, you can drop them whenever you like, just like you stopped thinking about your ex, you can stop thinking the worst and get rid of your fear.

What tip do you find most helpful? 

–

Join my free weekly newsletter and receive an essay every Thursday designed to help you grow. No paywalls, just insights. Subscribe for free.