If you pay attention to what most people do, then it’s pretty obvious why you might notice that people age faster than you.
My motto is, “Whatever 99% of people are doing, do the opposite.”
Unfortunately, many people have no idea how to stay in good health.
It’s very easy.
You should ensure that you get 8 hours of sleep per night, eat a healthy diet, work out several hours per week, and stay hydrated.
Unfortunately, many people are still destroying their health by engaging in unhelpful habits, i.e. smoking, drinking in excess, eating too much sugar, not staying hydrated, etc.
I’ve noticed that the people who look the worst are the ones who neglect their health the longest.
Just like good healthy habits compound and pay dividends in the years to come, like continued vitality, lack of disease and overall higher energy levels.
Practicing unhealthy habits will compound, and sooner or later, you’ll wonder why you’ve ended up in the Emergency room after having a severe heart attack.
Staying healthy is simple but not easy.
It’s 90% behaviour and 10% knowledge.
If you’re reading this now, ensure you’re not harming your future self and start practising healthy habits as soon as possible.
Not exercising: if you don’t move it, you lose it.
Not eating healthily. Your body is built for eating whole foods.
Being alone. Loneliness kills. Spend time with friends and family.
Being in a job you hate. This will destroy your soul.
Having friends who aren’t good for you. It’s better to have no friends than the wrong ones. But no one’s perfect.
Drugs. Be drug-free and stay in control of your life. If you can stay in control of your life, you can make it a good one.
Having the same old boring routine will make your life feel like Groundhog Day. Get out of your routine and mix it up. It’s the moments that we least expect that turn out to be the greatest. Be spontaneous.
Chronically being dehydrated. This will leave you with no energy, and you’ll feel awful. Drink at least 2–3 litres of water per day.
Consuming too much sugar. I used to get chronic migraines from this. I stopped eating lots of sugar, and they went away.
Drinking too much alcohol. Don’t become an alcoholic; life never turns out well for alchoholics.
One of the best pieces of advice that has helped me save a lot of money was:
Don’t buy a house that you can’t afford.
Nowadays, people are getting ultra-long mortgages, with some even lasting 50 years.
I’m sorry, but if you need to get a mortgage on a house that will last several decades, you can’t afford that house.
Because the longer and bigger your mortgage is, the more interest you need to pay on it.
The shorter and smaller your mortgage is, the less you’ll have to pay in interest.
What I did
In 2022, I bought my first house and took out a 15-year mortgage. My deposit was large enough that my mortgage costs me less than 25% of my take-home pay every month.
Although my house is nothing luxurious, it could be more accurately described as a shoe box.
It’s a meagre 2-bedroom terrace house. And I’m happy with it because it costs me hardly anything, and instead of wasting money on a bigger mortgage on a bigger house, I use the money I save to invest in myself.
I invest in myself by:
Having more experiences (like travelling to Rome, which I did last year).
Buying and reading good books that stand the test of time. When we improve our erudition, we are more effective in the world and can more easily achieve our goals.
Investing in index funds like the S&P 500 (so my money makes money) and putting more money in high-interest savings accounts, so I’ve always got money when I need it (you can’t put a price on this).
Invest in courses. I paid for a content marketing course a few years ago, and it’s served me very well for my online writing.
Don’t keep up with the Joneses
On the outside, the Joneses look like they’re doing well; they have a nice property, nice cars, and their garden looks pristine.
But you don’t see the stress of having hardly any money left over at the end of the month and the thousands of pounds in mortgage interest they have to pay every year.
By keeping up with the Joneses, you relinquish control over your life, and your finances start controlling you instead of the other way around.
If you’re someone who makes a decent living but is constantly short of cash, then I’m sorry, but you need to have a long, hard look at how you manage your finances.
For every expensive thing you’re thinking about buying, think “Is this necessary?”
Benjamin Franklin, one of the most erudite men to live, said:
“Make no expense but to do good to others or yourself; i.e., waste nothing.”
And I agree with this advice.
Do we really need the most expensive house money can buy?
Do we really need the most expensive car?
Even if we did have these, would they improve us or help others?
The answer is a big fat no.
Happiness isn’t found in what we buy but instead comes from how we think.
If you can drive your Fiat Panda as you would a Ferrari, and drive a Ferrari as you would a Fiat Panda, then you are close to being indifferent to wealth.
I recommend you consider practising becoming indifferent to wealth because, yes, money does make our lives easier, but it doesn’t make us happy.
We can only be happy by living virtuously and helping ourselves and others.
We will never be happy if we look for our happiness in expensive trinkets.
You don’t need to buy a house above your means to be happy
Buying a house worth £500,000 or £100,000 doesn’t matter. If you have a house you can afford, it’s the best thing you can do for your sanity (when you’re thinking about buying a house).
In the United Kingdom, a bigger house means you pay higher bills, higher council tax, more costs in maintenance and if you have a huge mortgage, remember you’ll be paying a fortune in interest rates over the term of the mortgage.
Remember, it’s better to have no mortgage if you can, but unfortunately, this isn’t feasible for most people. So if you do get a mortgage, I recommend paying no more than 25% of your take-home pay per month over 15 years. That way, you’ll be living within your means.
Why buying a house is better than renting (for most people)
When you rent a house, you’re literally throwing money down the drain that could be put toward a house deposit.
The only exception to this rule is if you’re only going to be in a location for a short period of time. In that case, renting is fine because you wouldn’t buy a house somewhere you’re staying temporarily.
Before I started writing online, one of the main things holding me back was the question, “What will people think of me?” This left me paralysed for so long that I didn’t start writing until way later in my life than I should have.
Now that I write consistently, I’ve learnt that some people like my writing, some people don’t, and some people are indifferent to it, a bit like how people are to me in real life.
And even when people don’t like my writing and comment negative things on my posts it really isn’t that bad in fact if you’re not p*issing a few people off with your writing your not doing it properly.
When I annoy people, I know I stand for something that is normally the opposite of what they value.
But these people who comment negative things on my posts don’t realise they’re helping me. Because the maxim “any publicity is good publicity” is true up to a certain extent.
Because at least if you’re getting negative comments on your posts, your writing isn’t boring and getting ignored. And there’s nothing worse than boring writing.
But the fact is, as a writer (and anyone posting content online), you’ll probably have to write a lot of boring stuff to write something good. It’s the natural progression you sign up for as a writer; you don’t become Montaigne overnight.
Anyway, that brings me back to the point of making decisions for you because in reality no one really cares, everyone is all in there little worlds and focused on themselves I mean I am 99% of the time and honestly I can’t remember a time when I was so offended by someone that I tried to stop them doing what they wanted to do.
The benefit of living in a Western country (I live in the UK) is that you can do what you want for the most part. But the fear of people’s opinions can stop us from exercising this freedom (as it has for me in the past).
This reminds me of two quotes by Roman emperor and philosopher Marcus Aurelius:
“We should listen only to those whose lives conform to nature. And the others? He bears in mind what sort of people they are—both at home and abroad, by night as well as day—and who they spend their time with. And he cares nothing for their praise—men who can’t even meet their own standards.”
I love this quote and come back to it time and time again because it’s so true. The fact is, we love ourselves more than others, but why do we care more about other people’s opinions than our own?
As a personal heuristic, I try to only listen to people whom I respect and who are virtuous, the type of people who can meet their own high standards.
“Then what is to be prized? An audience clapping? No. No more than the clacking of their tongues. Which is all that public praise amounts to—a clacking of tongues.”
I also come back to this piece of wisdom time and time again because we shouldn’t do things solely to get external praise; we should do things that we’re proud of for their own sake.
For example, when I write, I always try to post things I’m happy with. Of course, external praise is nice in the sense that it’s good to help people and have a positive impact on their lives.
But we shouldn’t crave other people’s praise so much that we lose a sense of why we’re really pursuing something. For example, I write because I’m learning as I go through life (I don’t claim to have everything figured out), and every post I write is a way for me to learn more about myself and the world, and as a side effect, I help others, and I also enjoy the flow state writing gets me into.
So I’ll drive the point home:
I promise no one cares what you’re doing. So start making decisions for you before your life is all used up. Start today because tomorrow isn’t guaranteed.
I wasn’t initially going to write this article. I had something else in mind. But I felt so compelled to write this that I couldn’t stop myself from doing so.
But before I get into the meat and potatoes of this article, I want to say thank you to my two paid subscribers, who give me so much encouragement and motivation to continue writing, and as a whole, thank you to all my subscribers, you are all, as we say in North East England, “Legends”.
Recently, I’ve been getting stressed about finding the right partner
Two weeks ago, I matched with this amazing Catholic woman on the dating app Hinge, and she seemed perfect. She was exactly what I was looking for in a partner.
We spoke on the phone for maybe 4 or 5 hours across the week, then we went for a meal together.
And I had a nice time, but I was talking way too much and rambling on about myself. I went against my own advice: I have two ears and one mouth, so I should listen twice as much as I speak.
I knew I was breaking my own rules of social conduct, but I couldn’t control my tongue, and I knew I ended up rambling on about silly things.
But anyway, a couple of days after our date, I was meant to be calling her, but she texted me saying that she wasn’t attracted to me spiritually and as a whole, so the phone call never happened.
This hurt because no one likes rejection, and I thought I found a unicorn because out of all the people I’ve dated and been in relationships with, I’ve never come across anyone like her.
But I respect her boundaries and wishes, and I actually appreciate her honesty, which tells me where I need to improve.
Because truth be told, I’m in the process of becoming Catholic, and spiritually, I have been feeling better going to church every Saturday, but the woman I went on a date with has been Catholic her whole life and is deeply involved in the church.
So even though I have grown spiritually, what I learned from meeting her was that I have a lot of spiritual growth yet to be realised before I can attract someone like her. Which is fine because embarking on this spiritual journey will only make me happier and a better person.
I’ve started going to church mass as much as possible
Every time I go to church mass, I feel better for it spiritually, so by only going to mass once per week, I’m leaving a lot of spiritual gains on the table.
So now I’m trying to go to mass daily (my current streak is 4 days in a row).
And I’m feeling much better, and I’ve stopped being so focused on finding a partner. I know that if I work on my spiritual health, everything else will fall in place, even my romantic relationships.
The strange thing that happened
I recently joined a new gym, and I looked up and in front of me was one of my ex-girlfriends, in fact, the first ever girlfriend I had when I was 16 years old, and the relationship ended really badly.
She said “Hi”, and I said, “Hi back”. I felt like I saw a ghost. I was lost for words and left the gym shortly after (I finished my workout anyway).
I will say I wish my ex-girlfriend, whom I saw all the best, if she ever reads this.
But I think seeing her is God’s or the universe’s way of telling me something.
I think I bumped into my ex-girlfriend to make me realise how badly that relationship went, and to remember not to worry about relationships because when you rush into them, they never end well, as I’ve experienced.
I think God was telling me, “Henry, don’t worry about finding a partner. Remember how bad your relationship with your ex-girlfriend went? I will see to it that you meet the right person when the time is right. Be patient.”
And this is how I make sense of the encounter.
The reason why it was strange was that I hadn’t seen this ex-girlfriend in around 10 years.
But I do believe in God/ some universal force and that everything happens for a reason, because what’s the alternative? To believe everything is meaningless? I’d rather try to make sense of it all as best I can.
So to drive the point home, I’ve learned from being rejected that I need to grow spiritually if I really want to make the most out of my life/ attract the right people into my life. And I’ll try my best to grow spiritually by going to Catholic mass as much as possible and putting into practice what I learn from Biblical teachings. And I won’t rush into finding a partner because I know that doing that in the past has only got me into trouble.
Thank you for reading, dear subscriber.
If you need help with anything, don’t hesitate to reach out.
Toodle-oo for now
-Henry
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My grandma sadly passed away in 2012. God bless her, but I got her car when she passed away.
It was a red Fiat Panda, and I loved it.
It wasn’t swanky or fancy, but I liked it because it felt like I was driving a small 4×4. It was Front Wheel Drive, but the car’s shape made it feel like something worthy of off-roading. The picture at the beginning of this post is the same model Fiat Panda I had.
Anyway, I remember the day I passed my driving test, I drove to McDonald’s and overtook one of my friends on a 30mph road. He had a much better car than I did, and that just made it funnier when I overtook him.
I drove to college, and when I went outside to play football (soccer for you Americans) with some of my college friends, I’ll never forget what I saw on my car.
There was a ring doughnut placed through my car’s aerial on my roof.
I was a bit annoyed, but it was funny at the same time.
I mean, when have you gone to your car and seen a doughnut placed around your car’s aerial?
Anyway, I’m digressing. The point I want to make is that leasing your car is a waste of money.
Buy a red Fiat Panda if you have to, but don’t lease/ rent your car
I drove my Fiat Panda from 2016 to 2023. It put in a good shift, and I would’ve kept it if it didn’t sound like it was about to take off like an aeroplane when I was driving on the Motorways.
Honestly, the panda making these weird aeroplane sounds was slightly scary but also funny.
But the panda for those 7 years barely cost me a dime.
And I managed to save a good chunk of money for my house deposit (the one I’m living in now) during this time.
If I leased/ rented a fancy car during those 7 years, I’d probably still be living with my parents (not that there’s anything wrong with that, I just think it’s good to get on the housing ladder as soon as you can, especially in the United Kingdom, where I’m from).
All cars do the same thing, no matter if you have a Nissan Cube or a Bugatti Veyron
If you’re thinking about forking out money to lease a car, don’t do it.
What I recommend instead is setting up a safety fund in case you need to fork out money in an emergency, like when your ceiling falls down (like mine just did).
Put money toward your house/house deposit, because it won’t depreciate as a car does.
For example, after a car leaves the showroom, it loses around 15% of its value.
After year one, it can lose up to 30% of its value.
And after 3 years, it can lose up to 60%.
Compare this to buying a house: your house price generally rises with inflation, so you essentially lose 0% of the money you put into it, and you might even gain some if you improve it.
This might seem controversial, but I invest in the stock market through the Vanguard LifeStrategy 100% Equity Fund. This means some of my money is invested in the top 8860 companies worldwide.
And as it stands, I’m gaining over 10% in interest every year.
I only recommend investing in index funds (the fund I invest in is made up of index funds) when you’ve paid off a good chunk of your mortgage and have a safety fund. In the meantime, if you need a car, buy one that is good value for money.
Why index funds have generally been a good investment
When you put money into index funds like the S&P 500, your money usually goes up in the long term because, as a whole, the economy normally grows. By putting your money into the top 500 American companies, it’s diversified, so you don’t put your eggs in one basket like you would if you put all your money in one company’s stock.
Of course, the stock market goes through bull and bear markets, but overall, it usually recovers, companies start doing even better, and the fund hits new heights that you profit from.
For example, if you put $1 in the S&P 500 in 1926, then that $1 would’ve been worth $5940 in 2016. (I got this figure from Little Book of Common Sense Investing by John C Bogle).
When you lease a car, you’re throwing your money away because of how much you are forking out monthly for a car that isn’t yours.
And when you buy an expensive car, it loses its value so quickly (vintage cars are the exception to this rule), so you’ll be throwing your money down the drain.
When you spend money, try to be frugal, don’t be wasteful with it.
Make sure that most of the time when you spend your money, it either holds its own by not depreciating or, even better, actually makes money for you.
This is just my 2 cents on the matter, and this advice has worked well for me, but what do I know?
I just don’t want y’all to be broke.
Not that I’m rich.
I’m just saying.
Hope this helps.
And stay tuned for the next money-saving tip I’m going to post next week.
God bless.
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A few years ago, I wasn’t feeling too good about myself, and I’d been single for several years, so because I’d been single for so long, I thought the answer to my pain was to get into a romantic relationship, so I decided to download the dating app Hinge, and I got swiping.
After a couple of months on Hinge, I’d been on one date where the woman I met up with looked nothing like her dating profile pictures, as those pictures were taken years ago, so on the date with her, I prematurely ended it, and she texted me saying, “I’m sorry I wasn’t what you were expecting.” And I don’t think I replied.
The second date was with a woman who did look like her dating profile pictures. We seemingly hit it off on the first date, though, looking back, I came across as desperate and needy. I was basically begging to go out with her again. If I could tell my old self one thing now, it would be “Have some self-respect.”
Anyway, we went on a second date, and it was ok, but I ended up meeting her mum and her mum’s boyfriend, which seems unusual on the second date. Thinking about it now, it’s better to introduce each other to families when the relationship takes on a more serious tone.
We kept dating, and eventually I begged her to become my girlfriend, and she hesitantly said yes. And when we had our first kiss, it was the most awkward kiss imaginable. I’m surprised we both let this relationship go on so long, but we did.
The whole relationship turned out to be a strange one. We were never right for each other, and even though deep down I knew this, I still tried to be the perfect partner, apart from that one time I went to the strip club, which was difficult to tell her, but she wasnt really that bothered when I confessed.
I digress, what I’m trying to say is she didn’t particularly add anything to my life, yet I tried to add lots to hers by buying her gifts and taking her out for nice meals like fine dining (which I can’t stand).
Now I know why I was so desperate; it was because I was looking outwards for happiness and validation, which is the worst thing you can do, because you can’t rely on anyone else but yourself for your happiness.
The Stoic Roman Emperor Marcus Aurelius said:
“Yes, keep on degrading yourself, soul. But soon your chance at dignity will be gone. Everyone gets one life. Yours is almost used up, and instead of treating yourself with respect, you have entrusted your own happiness to the souls of others.”
When I first read that quote, I thought that it was astonishing to read that one of the greatest emperors of all time struggled with what I struggle with, which is looking outwards for happiness. When we rely on others opinions and words for happiness how can we not be unhappy?
Remember that you are dust and to dust you shall return
I’m writing this post on Wednesday, the 18th of February and this morning I went to church to celebrate Ash Wednesday, and the priest said to me, “Remember that you are dust and to dust you shall return”.
It’s good to remember this whenever we put someone else’s opinion on a pedestal above our own, because just as we are dust, so are they. And the only favour/grace we should seek is God’s, because if we don’t, we run the risk of treating other people like gods. If we get too arrogant about our own opinions and viewpoints, we make the gravest mistake: turning ourselves into gods.
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I’m writing this post on Saturday, the 7th February 2026, and I’ve just got back from going to Mass at my local church.
Over the past several months, I’ve been going through a process to become Catholic.
And praying every day and going to mass on the weekend have made me feel better spiritually.
I’m joining an institution that has been going for 2000 years.
Not only that, but the social aspect of going to church has helped a lot.
I just got talking to an older man named Joe and had a good conversation with him at church.
I’ve also got to know the priests and deacons, and I’m learning a lot about theology and philosophy.
Religion is growing in South America but declining in the West
I think this is a shame.
Because religion helps bind people together through shared values.
Around one in two adults in the US struggles with chronic loneliness.
And in 2025, the World Health Organisation (WHO) declared loneliness a pressing global health threat.
I think those stats prove we’re in a loneliness epidemic.
I have 2 close friends, but I don’t often see them
For the past several years, I’ve had two main friends, but I’m lucky if I see them once a month.
I don’t expect people to be there for me at the drop of a hat, because it’s difficult for me to do that for others, bearing in mind my obligations.
It’s just made me think I need to make new friends.
And since regularly going to church, I’m starting to meet new people.
Luckily, I have my parents
I see my parents several times per week, and I know they’re always there for me, which is nice.
But if I didn’t have them, I’d spend more of my time alone or maybe force myself even more to meet new people.
I’ve definitely been lonely
I experience loneliness as a feeling of melancholy, and I start overthinking and get into a self-loathing frame of mind.
When I socialise with people, it brings me out of myself and stops that harmful habit of focusing exclusively on myself and self-loathing.
We’re more connected than ever
Even though we have social media and can talk to anyone anytime, fewer people are socialising in person.
And even though we can contact anyone anytime, via call or text, they’re nothing like in-person interactions.
Essentially, because we have social media, we know we can contact people whenever we want, so we don’t.
How I’m going to try to meet more new people
I’m going to start attending more church-related events.
Also, if there are some groups related to a hobby that interests me, I may join them.
Groups such as writing or running groups.
I’m naturally introverted
Meeting new people doesn’t come easily to me.
It’s something I’m going to have to work at.
Because, naturally, I can spend most of my time on my own without feeling down.
My tolerance for loneliness is relatively high.
This got me in trouble in my last romantic relationship.
I wanted more “Me time”, and my ex took that badly and assumed I didn’t want to spend time with her.
Even though loneliness is a modern disease, don’t associate with just anyone
Some people we meet are wonderful, and some people are degenerates.
You mustn’t make anyone your friend.
Assess their character first, and then make them your friend if you’re confident they’re good people.
Most people make the mistake of befriending someone and assessing their character later.
Better to never become friends with someone than have to break up the friendship.
It’s better to be alone than be with the wrong spouse or befriend the wrong person
I’m fully aware that being alone all the time is bad for you. But don’t assume I’m telling you to be friends with anyone or get into a romantic relationship with anyone.
The key is to befriend people / have a spouse who enhances your life and vice versa.
There’s no point in befriending a degenerate who brings you down to their level.
Protect yourself.
You are responsible for who you choose as your friends or spouse.
Hi, I’ve just published my new book, The Manual for Mental Strength: Ancient Heuristics For The Modern Crisis.
In this book, I talk about my struggle with mental health and how I built resilience. And my goal is for this book to help other people improve their mental health as well.
This book started as a Quora answer that went viral with several hundred upvotes, so I decided to expand it into a book.
I hope you enjoy it, and please leave a review because reviews help push my book out to more people. As an independent author, reviews help me grow and improve massively.
As I’ve mentioned before, I’ve had chronic wrist pain for 2 years.
Several months ago, I had my second surgery to fix the issue with my wrist.
I’m trying to strengthen my wrist with physio, but it’s excruciating.
I’ve just been for a walk, and I couldn’t help but think pride was the cause of my injury.
Pride seems to be causing problems for everyone nowadays.
Let me start with how pride destroyed me
I injured my wrist lifting too much weight at the gym.
Why did I want to lift so much weight, you ask?
Well, it was because I wanted to gain as much muscle as possible to attract the ladies.
I was trying to gain muscle above all else to look superior to others and increase my chances of getting with more women.
The sad truth is that most women don’t even care about muscles that much.
And the ex-girlfriend I had during the time of the injury couldn’t care less about how much muscle I had.
My story is only scratching the surface
My friend told me a story about his friend, who was on steroids and is a bodybuilder.
Apparently, this bodybuilder lifted so much weight while barbell squatting that his knee popped out, and he had to have surgery to fix it.
Also, when I’ve browsed online, I’ve seen the ‘turkey teeth’ phenomenon, where young men and women travel to Turkey to have their teeth replaced with white, artificial teeth, even though their teeth were fine.
I’ve heard and read horror stories about Turkey teeth.
Also becoming more common is leg-lengthening surgery, which seems problematic.
Men can’t bear the receding hairline anymore
Every man and his father is getting a hair transplant these days.
That’s fine if people want to do that, but coming from someone with a receding hairline, having one isn’t that bad.
We’ve turned into a superficial bunch
It seems most people nowadays are prioritising their appearance over their character.
I would rather try to improve my character, that is to say, working on being a good person, as religion and philosophy advise, than what hairstyle I have.
So many people are putting the cart before the horse
I think character is what we should all start focusing on improving, rather than our looks.
But even when people want to improve their looks (which is ok in moderation), many go straight for artificial treatments.
For example, instead of losing weight the healthy way, people are turning to Ozempic and gastric bypasses.
Instead of building muscle to stay healthy, people are taking steroids and lifting so heavy that they’re stressing their bodies beyond their natural limit, which is a recipe for injury.
The point I’m trying to make
I don’t want to seem like I’m moralising.
I just want people to improve themselves for the right reasons and the right way.
Because most of these treatments I’ve mentioned are unnecessary.
And for many people, they cause a lot more harm than good.
I’ve fallen into the pride trap.
And I’ve been in chronic pain for 2 years, and I don’t think my wrist will ever be the same.
I don’t want you to suffer as I have.
Because life is much more complicated when you’re in chronic pain.
You have one body.
If you ruin it, it may be ruined forever.
As a rule of thumb, I only have medical procedures when I need them
A word you might not have come across is called iatrogenics, which means illness, injury or even death caused unintentionally by medical treatment.
For example, I read a story about a girl who died from taking the contraceptive pill. God bless her. Her name was Aine Hurst. She was only 19 and from the United Kingdom.
That’s iatrogenics.
And that’s why I avoid unnecessary medical procedures, and I advise you to do the same.
Iatrogenics causes more deaths around the world than road traffic accidents, malaria and diabetes.
But that’s only the ones we can distinguish by recorded fatalities.
Many effects from iatrogenics go under the radar.
For example, my mum got put on potent antidepressants as a teenager.
These antidepressants had a gruesome withdrawal effect on her and have permanently affected her to this day.
And the whole situation has caused a massive strain on my family.
I know for a fact there are lots of families going through similar scenarios to mine.
Why do you think we’re never told about iatrogenics?
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