Voltaire once said perfect is the enemy of good. This quote is extremely true in all areas of our lives.
No matter what we do, we’ll never get things perfect. It doesn’t matter whether it’s to do with our fitness goals, work or business goals or even in our relationships.
We’re only human, and ultimately all that matters is that we show up and put the work in every day.
For example, posting a good blog post is much better than not posting at all (because it’s not perfect). Sticking to a good workout routine will yield far better results than looking for a perfect one (and never even starting). Following a good investment strategy is much better than investing in the seemingly too-good-to-be-true Ponzi scheme.
Eggs are one of the best sources of protein you can consume. They’re the most bioavailable source of protein. This means that eggs are very easily used by the body (unlike plant protein).
Eggs are also very versatile, you can cook them in lots of different ways such as scrambled, boiled, fried and poached.
Below shows the different times that it takes to boil an egg on the hob depending on how you liked your boiled eggs.
4 minutes for dippy eggs ( eggs and soldiers meaning eggs with thin slices of toast).
5 minutes soft boiled.
8 mins medium boiled.
10 mins hard boiled.
I normally do hard boiled eggs, what type are your favourite?
Friedrich Nietzsche was one of the most famous philosophers of the 20th century. Here are 3 of his most interesting quotes:
1. “What does not kill me makes me stronger.”
If we challenge ourselves, these challenges can ultimately make us stronger and more effective individuals.
Imagine a life without challenges, it would be boring.
When you lift weights and push yourself to the point of discomfort (within reason). You’ll find in the next session that the same weight that felt uncomfortable, now feels easy.
If we challenge ourselves mentally, such as challenging ourselves at work. And we also push ourselves to read across a wide range of genres and push ourselves intellectually, it’ll be easier to face other problems in our lives when they arise.
2. “He who fights with monsters should look to it that he himself does not become a monster.”
Marcus Aurelius said in Meditations “The best revenge is not to be like that.”
Just because we all have the power to be a “monster” and some people might act in that way, doesn’t mean we should act that way.
We all have the power to act in a virtuous way, and if we do that we’ll help ourselves and others.
3. ” He who has a why to live can bear almost any how”
Viktor Frankl who was a prisoner of war in concentration camps during world war 2, survived partly due to the fact that he found meaning in the suffering.
During his time in Auschwitz, he recreated the manuscript for his incredible book Mans Search For Meaning. This provided meaning for Viktor.
Viktor theorized that prisoners in the concentration camp who found some meaning in their lives were more likely to survive.
This same idea can help us in all areas of our lives. If you want to achieve a goal, it can help to narrow down the real reason why you want to achieve that goal.
For example, if you want to get fitter and healthier, your why could be because you want to have more energy, live a long life filled with vitality and set a good example to others.
If you look for ways on google to de-stress. Chances are you’ll run into breathing exercises.
Truth be told there are many different breathing exercises that you can do.
There are so many that it can be hard to figure out which one to choose.
I’ve tried box breathing, the Wim Hof Method and others but here’s the easiest method that I find works best.
Breathe In Slowly And Deeply Through Your Nose And Exhale Through Your Mouth
I’ve found that this simple exercise can help massively with stress for a couple of different reasons.
1. It’s easy and it’s the normal way to breathe ( Nose breathing has been shown to be more healthy than mouth breathing).
2. Slow, deep, breathing stimulates your vagus nerve which has been shown to reduce anxiety and activates your parasympathetic nervous system ( The nervous system associated with relaxation and sleep as opposed to the flight or flight response which is called the sympathetic nervous system which is normally activated when you”re stressed).
How To Reap The Benefits Of This Breathing Exercise
Do this breathing exercise 1-2 times per day, for 10 minutes each time. The benefits are very similar to meditation ( This breathing exercise is a very basic form of meditation). And if you consistently make time for this breathing exercise you’ll feel a sense of calm, peace and relaxation.
Make sure to take deep but comfortable breaths. Make sure to focus on your breath throughout the exercise and if your mind starts to wander focus back on your breath.
Every individual is different and he or she feels love differently. This is mainly what the book is about. If someone shows us love in a love language that isn’t our own, and fails to show us, love, in our real love language we won’t feel loved.
What Are The Five Love Languages
1: Words of affirmation ( for example saying I love you to your spouse).
2: Acts of service ( for example making dinner or doing chores around the house for your spouse).
3: Gifts ( for example buying gifts/ presents for your spouse).
4: Quality time ( for example, having conversations with your spouse and experiencing things together).
5: Physical touch ( for example, sex, hugs, kisses etc).
If you feel loved mainly by physical touch and you didn’t get that from your spouse you’d feel unloved.
Everyone’s love language is different, but it’s important to find out your and your spouse’s love language. And if you speak to each other in the correct love languages you’ll both feel loved and the relationship should thrive.
In Gary’s words, ” your and your spouse’s love tanks will be full”.
1. ” But to you who are listening I say: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you…. Do to others as you would have them do to you. If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners love those who love them. “
Gary quotes Luke 6:27-28 from the bible several times in his book. The fact is whether it’s in a relationship with our spouses or relationships in general hate is never the answer.
“Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.”
2. “Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.”
Gary also quotes Luke 6:38 from the bible. I’m a firm believer that the more we help others the more we help ourselves. And if we all endeavour to be givers, the more we help others and ourselves.
” Some people, when they do someone a favour, are always looking for a chance to call it in. And some aren’t, but they’re still aware of it—still, regard it as a debt. But others don’t even do that. They’re like a vine that produces grapes without looking for anything in return… after helping others… They just go on to something else… We should be like that. —Marcus Aurelius, Roman Emperor
3. “Can emotional love be reborn in a marriage? You bet. The key is to learn the primary love language of your spouse and choose to speak it.”
Choosing to speak your spouse’s love language, and your spouse choosing to speak your love language is extremely powerful. And if done correctly should breathe new life into a marriage or relationship.
Gary also says in his book:
” Some couples believe that the end of the “in-love” experience means they have only two options: resign themselves to a life of misery with their spouse, or jump ship and try again. Our generation has opted for the latter, whereas an earlier generation often chose the former. Before we automatically conclude that we have made the better choice, perhaps we should examine the data. The divorce rate for second marriages is higher than the divorce rate of first marriages. The divorce rate in third marriages is higher still. Apparently, the prospect of a happier marriage the second and third time around is not substantial.”
So with more unsuccessful marriages comes even more unsuccessful marriages.
If the power of love languages is used in relationships, Gary argues that failed relationships and failed marriages can be prevented.
The circle of influence includes things that are in our control. Some things in the circle of influence are:
Our character.
Our choices.
How we react.
To focus on the circle of influence is to focus on what we can control.
The Circle Of Concern
The circle of concern includes things that we have no control over. Such as:
The weather.
What other people do and say.
Politics.
News.
To Be More Effective We Should Spend More Time On Things We Can Control
To spend time in the circle of concern is to waste precious time and energy.
Almost 2000 years ago the Roman Emperor Marcus Aurelius knew the power of focusing on the circle of influence. In his book Meditations, he said:
“The tranquillity that comes when you stop caring what they say. Or think, or do. Only what you do. (Is this fair? Is this the right thing to do?) <…> not to be distracted by their darkness. To run straight for the finish line, unswerving.”
To Focus On The Circle Of Concern Is To Give Up Responsibility
Ultimately we shouldn’t let external conditions dictate our lives.
It’s not what happens to us in life that matters its all about how we respond. And at each moment we all have the power to choose that response.
Some Things In Our control That Can Help us Improve Our Lives
Health- workout 3-5 times per week, eat mostly whole foods, and get 8 hours of sleep per night.
Education – read 45 minutes to 1 hour per day.
Wealth – save/ invest at least 10% of your income each month.
Of course, there are many things we can focus on that can help us improve our lives or help us get to a said goal but this blog post would include an endless list if I were to list them all.
Focus On The End Goal Of What You Want To Achieve And Work Backwards
If you have a goal or an area of life where you’d like to improve, first determine the desired outcome and then make a plan including things you can control now, to reach that goal.
For example:
If your goal was to build a blog, you could start posting every day. If you wanted to get stronger, you could start a weekly strength training program.
Life can be overwhelmingly complex at times, but the more we focus on the circle of influence the more simplified life becomes.
Edith Eger who is a holocaust survivor and psychologist said in her book the choice:
” To be free is to live in the present. If we are stuck in the past, saying, “If only I had gone there instead of here …” or “If only I had married someone else …,” we are living in a prison of our own making. Likewise if we spend our time in the future, saying, “I won’t be happy until I graduate …” or “I won’t be happy until I find the right person.” The only place where we can exercise our freedom of choice is in the present.”
The present is all we ever have. And that’s where true freedom and happiness are found.
I’ve just been reading the choice by Edith Eger who is a Holocaust survivor and psychologist.
For many years Edith bottled up the terrible things that happened in Auschwitz.
But the fact is, she found that the more she denied that part of herself the more it hurt.
She found that suppressing the feelings of what went on in the concentration camp only made it harder to let them go.
Edith says “Expression is the opposite of depression”.
The fact is we need ways to cope with the shit life throws at us.
Some things that can help:
Talking Therapy.
Eating healthily.
Working out.
Getting enough sleep.
Spending time with friends and family.
If we’re healthier we’ll better face the turmoil the world throws at us. And if we have friends, family or even therapists to express our thoughts, feelings and emotions to life will be easier.
Whatever your goal may be, it could be a health goal or a personal project like a blog or whatever it may be.
Just starting small, doing something, is better than nothing.
In fitness, it could be just removing sugary drinks. Or for a personal blog, you could post every day even if your article isn’t perfect.
All in all, you can either start small now or start big someday ( the day will probably never come.)
This moment right now in front of us is all we ever have. It’s up to us to use it as effectively as possible to get to where we want to go in life and experience the things we want to experience.
1. Save/Invest at least 10% of your income every month (more if possible)
In the book, the millionaire next door Thomas J Stanley shows us that most millionaires, know how to save. And especially for a long time (most of their lives).
Investing at least 10% of your income in an index fund or other mutual fund could build amazing compound interest if you invest for years to come.
2. Become Frugal
In the book the millionaire next door by Thomas J Stanley one of the reasons why millionaires are wealthy is because they aren’t wasteful.
They budget, they don’t pay over the odds for things, and again they save.
Benjamin Franklin knew the importance of frugality, so much so that he practised the virtue of frugality regularly.
Of his 13 virtues ( he practised a different virtue every day) the 5th virtue was frugality.
Here’s how Benjamin Franklin described the virtue – ” Make no expense but to do good to others or yourself; i.e., waste nothing.”
3. Learn Valuable Skills And Keep Learning To Increase Income
The more we know, the more we can do, and the more we can do the more oppurtinies we have to succeed. Becoming a perpetual learner can make us better at life and can help us become more effective individuals in general.
In the book so good they can’t ignore you by Cal Newport, he peddles the idea that the guys and gals with the best jobs are the ones who have learned valuable skills and/or are the best at what they do.
When you’re the best at what you do, you’re in demand. And people will pay you handsomely for your services and time. The individuals who are the best at what they do often tend to have the most freedom as well.
The Bottom Line
If we can consistently save/ invest money in things that will give us a healthy rate of return in the long term. While also being frugal and developing valuable skills. We’ll be getting closer to wealth every single day.
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